If you really knew me, you’d know I can’t fall asleep without music or the television on. Silence is horrible, and it’s quite possibly one of the worst things ever. Ever been somewhere it’s so silent you feel like your ears are going to bleed? Stuff of nightmares right there.
If you really knew me you’d know my best friend is basically my twin. We told people for years that we were sisters, twins born almost two months apart (don’t ask me how anyone bought this), and when I moved people would often go up to her and ask where her twin sister was. We’ve had conversations in squeaks and were able to understand each other 100%. In high school, we also had a tiny photo of Elton John in both of our closets, covered by miniature curtains you could pull back. Do not even ask about that, it’s a (faux) twin thing. Hold me closer, tiny dancer.
If you really knew me you’d know I have a serious addiction to coke (the carbonated kind, not the powder). It was passed down to me by my parents (except their palettes are not as ~refined~ and they drink Pepsi), and all of us could easily drink a 2-liter a day by ourselves. I know, it’s terrifying. It doesn’t make any of us gain weight though (no, that’s my fondness for Five Guys), and we all have awesome teeth. Our kidneys, however, are probably another story.
If you really knew me you’d know I can’t stomach soft foods. It’s a leftover reaction from when I had “food issues” (I’m still in denial about what it really was). Cottage cheese? Excuse me whilst I vomit all over you.
Speaking of, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve puked in my life (not counting when I was still in diapers and couldn’t walk). I have one piece of advice for y’all regarding this: Never eat McDonald’s and drink vodka (even if your friend insists).
If you really knew me you’d know I’m nearly cold-blooded. Oh, it’s 95 degrees in the house? Sorry, I didn’t notice, I was under my comforter. It’s 107 outside? Excuse me, I’d like to take a nap in my car (with the windows down, ofc). Anything below 80 degrees outside is chilly or just downright cold. My Yankee husband is convinced I’m trying to give him heatstroke.
If you really knew me you’d know I want nothing more than to be a mother. We’ve been trying for almost a year now and no luck; I haven’t even told my best friend (twin). I’m almost catatonic I’m so terrified of something being wrong with either of us. This is a subject that’s really hard to talk about for me. There, big confession time. Now, let’s move on.
If you really knew me, you’d know I love people too much, too deeply, and too fiercely – to the point of destruction almost. I’ve been kicked out of a school district, put in juvenile detention, and almost ended up in jail because I loved and trusted the wrong people. In each of these cases the only thing I was guilty of was having a soft heart. You may think that I have trouble trusting people now, but I keep finding that is not the case. This is actually not a good thing.
If you really knew me you’d know my spirit animal is a cross between an alligator, a rhino, and a whale (with the exception of orcas & dolphins – they’re bastards). You’d also know that when I was little and we’d go to the zoo, I’d drag my mother to see the rhinos first. I wanted to see them poop. Don’t judge, I thought it was funny for some reason.
If you really knew me you’d know I don’t have many friends, online or off. I hate it. I should probably change my spirit animal to socially awkward penguin, because it’s certainly a better fit.
There, now you’ve learned more about me. Happy Wednesday! Feel free to share your own and link it in the comments.
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